


Forward

by quilfish_swan



Series: Closer (Sakura/Sasuke post-war one-shots) [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Apologies, Closure, F/M, Gen, Hugs, POV Haruno Sakura, Post-War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2020-06-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:22:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24865249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quilfish_swan/pseuds/quilfish_swan
Summary: A year after the Fourth Great Ninja War, Sakura and Sasuke have a long-awaited and much-needed conversation.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke
Series: Closer (Sakura/Sasuke post-war one-shots) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1843336
Comments: 8
Kudos: 69





	Forward

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first real* fanfic! I am excited to share! Sakura and Sasuke are NOT my favorite characters or pairing by any means, so it feels strange that this is the first thing I felt compelled to actually finish. But they have grown on me, and this scene has been floating around in my head for a while. I'm sure I'm not the only one who wanted more info on these two if they insist on being canon ;) 
> 
> Enjoy! :)

The setting sun bathes the world in pink, and a slight breeze dances through the evening air, tickling her arms and causing her to shiver.

Even now, a year since the end of the war, peaceful Konoha nights still feel to Sakura like a strange dream.

She stands on the porch. Her eyes, unfocused, rest in the distance.

The world is moving on; Kakashi is settled into his duties as the Hokage. The rebuilding of the village is finally complete. Naruto and Hinata are talking about getting married; just the thought makes her smile.

_Moving on…_

In some ways, she has moved on, too. She’s out of her parents’ home now, sharing an apartment with Ino. She enjoys the company, even if Ino spends more time with Sai than with her. (Sakura is happy for them, truly.)

And, in addition to her job as a doctor, she teaches medical ninjutsu classes now, at the academy. She loves her kids, their energy and spunk a constant reminder of her own academy days, which feel more distant every day.

_Moving on…_

Still, she feels halted. 

Stuck in a limbo, of sorts.

Sometimes, she pretends that this ever-present void is not caused by the single person who occupies her most frequent thoughts, who has done so for most of her life; but she knows that in the end, it’s useless to fight it. Everything inevitably leads back to him.

Sasuke’s time in prison will come to an end very soon, or so Naruto has told her; she hasn’t heard it from Kakashi directly. And, with all the time and space that has swollen between them, she knows they need to talk—really talk—if she ever hopes to salvage what remains of their friendship (is _friendship_ the right word for what they'd had?). While she visited him briefly several times during the year since the war’s end, they never spoke more than a few polite words. 

They never spoke of that day at the bridge. 

Never spoke of the events at the final battle, the things said and left unsaid.

Her feelings (which had at some point evolved from adoration to a deep and abiding desire just to _be_ there for him and with him) haven't waned with time, like she thought they might. But there is bitterness, now, too—time and space did indeed foster longing, but also gave her clarity, revealed cruelty and mistakes she tried so long to ignore.

She hopes that the darkness that plagued him and festered in him for all those years is gone now. _Oh_ , she hopes, so much that it hurts.

But she won’t know until she sees him.

As if summoned, a voice to her right startles her out of her thoughts.

“Sakura.”

Her breath catches when she registers the deep timbre, smooth and unmistakable.

Eyes wide, she turns. 

“Sasuke!" 

Though barely more than a whisper, she couldn’t disguise her astonishment. She’d known this would happen eventually, but seeing him here, now—

“Are you—”

He nods. “I’m free.”

She stares at him in awe, as if trying to convince herself he is real. "How did you know where to find me?”

“Naruto.”

She laughs. “Of course.”

A pause.

Her elation slowly deflates as she is reminded of things she knows she should say, but doesn’t know how. 

Several seconds pass before either of them speaks. She is surprised at how sad she sounds when she finally forces the words from her throat. 

“Sasuke, what are you doing here?” 

It's an accusation and a plea at once.

As if he, too, had chosen that exact moment to break the silence, he almost interrupts her. 

“Can you ever forgive me, Sakura?”

She blinks. Of all the things he could say, she hadn’t actually thought—

“What?” escapes her lips.

“Can you ever forgive me for everything I’ve done?”

His gentle tone astounds her; it's such a contrast to the cold, callous voice she used to know.

Had Sasuke really come here to apologize to her? She’d heard from Kakashi that after his release he may be leaving the village indefinitely, and while the idea made her ache, she thought it was likely that he’d come to say goodbye.

But now—her heart pounds at the prospect of closure. She allows his words to reopen wounds never fully healed, fresh and throbbing. 

The memory of his heartlessness haunts her: the way he’d cast his friends aside like they meant nothing to him. The way he’d looked at her, at Naruto, at Kakashi with unfeeling eyes every time they'd tried to bring him home. The way it didn’t seem to matter to him whether the three of them lived or died. And those words...

_"I have no reason to love her or be loved by her."_

She hates that they still hurt, hates that she still hears them when she sleeps, because it _shouldn't_ matter, she _should_ be past it, but she's not. 

Her eyes sting and close at the crystal clarity of it all.

(Even so, she longs to explain that somehow, even through all her hurting, even after everything he has done, she has always known that she would forgive him. In that way, she supposes, she forgave him long ago.)

“You tried to kill me, you know.” It’s a weak attempt at humor, soaked in too much pain for even a pity-laugh. She forces a smile and adds, "Though to be fair, I tried to kill you first," still unsure to this day if in that moment she could have actually done it.

When he says nothing, she dares to look to his eyes. The suffering she finds there makes her heart clench.

To her further surprise and horror, Sasuke kneels, bows his forehead to the floor at Sakura’s feet. 

Her mouth falls open. 

“Sasuke!” She scrambles to lift him, but he holds firm.

“Sakura,” he whispers, discomfort and sincerity both evident, “I am so sorry.”

She stops. Straightening, she looks down at him. Leaves rustle in the distance. Until their meeting tonight, she had all but accepted that Sasuke may never show remorse for the way he’d treated her and the rest of their team, his friends, who loved him. Being acknowledged in this way feels remarkably like ointment on infected wounds.

“What are you sorry for?” It’s soft, but it is not rhetorical; she wants to hear him say it—perhaps she _needs_ to hear him say it.

He draws a breath. “You’ve always tried to be there for me,” he starts, penitent and deliberate, “and I was terrible to you. You, Naruto, Kakashi-sensei… all you three ever did was try to help me, and I pushed you away. I was wrong. I caused you so much pain, Sakura.” He falters. “I’m so sorry.”

It seems like he might say more, but he evidently decides against it. He waits to rise, face still to the ground. The words hang in the air, suspended between them. They sounded strange on his lips, almost unnatural, and she marvels at how much he’s changed in a year.

“I have waited for so long to hear you say something like that,” she says finally, holding tightly to her own arms. “Now that you’ve said it, I don’t know what to do."

Her exhale sounds almost like a laugh. Gently, she says, "Please stand up.”

He does, and their faces are now closer than before.

She looks at the ground. “I love you, Sasuke.” It’s stated more as an objective fact than a confession. “I always will. Naruto and Kakashi-sensei will, too," she adds, hoping to comfort him, and feeling confidently enough in the way her friend and teacher feel to speak on their behalf. "We all love you, so much." After a brief pause, she settles on the phrase, "And I have already forgiven you." 

She meets his eyes, which shine with relief and disbelief.

“Thank you,” he says quietly. He then adds hesitantly, "I don’t know if I can give you... the kind love that you want.”

She knows what he means, and before he can say more, she offers a soft, “It’s okay."

And it is. Of course a small, faraway part of her still hopes, that one day he will love her as much as she loves him, in the same way that she does. That part of her may always be there. But having him here, safe and open to her friendship—it's more than she ever thought she would have, and it's more than enough. 

She says, "I just want to be your friend, Sasuke."

That's all she's ever _really_ wanted, after all.

He seems moved by the statement, as if he's never been told such a thing in his life, and it breaks her heart. His eyes close in gratitude. Then their gazes are locked again. She searches his face, and smiles when she finds there’s not a trace of anger or hatred left. 

His left eye, purple and piercing, is barely visible through his hair. His hair… It’s gotten longer since she saw him last.

Without warning, he reaches out with his good arm and wraps her in a hug.

Eyes round, she waits a moment before reciprocating, the suddenness causing tears to form afresh.

As they embrace, birds sing and crickets chirp, welcoming the coming dusk. She savors the contact, the closeness from him that she has craved all her life.

“Thank you, Sakura. For everything." 

The words are soft in her hair, and somehow it’s enough to melt away the years of pain. Before she realizes what’s happening, her shoulders are shaking, and tears are flowing. 

He pulls away, gripping her shoulder. "Why are you crying?” he asks, alarmed.

She laughs and smears her cheek. “I guess I’m just so happy.”

It’s honest, and it feels so good to say it.

He awkwardly brushes more tears away, and she flushes at the touch.

After a moment he offers a small smile. Then, he lifts his hand and taps her forehead with two fingers.

She closes her eyes upon the light impact, the strangeness of the gesture sending her a few steps backward. When she opens her eyes, puzzled, he is already walking away.

For a moment they are twelve years old again, and she recalls the exact tightening of her throat and ache in her chest she’d feel as she would watch him walk away from her, over and over and over, always just beyond her reach.

But this time, he stops. 

Without turning around, he says, “Would you… like to see each other again?”

She feels her face redden. She scoffs, still blinking through tears. 

“What do you think?” It comes out snarky, and with more desperation than she would have liked to seep through.

“We’ll have to keep it on the down-low.”

She figured as much, his situation with the village as delicate as it is. Gaining confidence, she teases, “Oh? Even more fun.”

He turns his head, and though his face is silhouetted by the setting sun behind him, she sees a smile. 

“I will come back tomorrow, then.”

She watches him disappear into the light.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> EDIT: I wrote three more works based around this one, and after getting a feel for their relationship as it exists in my mind, I've gone in and edited this first one to make the four of them feel a little more cohesive. (Some of the characterization felt off upon my re-reads, so I'm gradually fixing it. :) This pairing is now very close to my heart.


End file.
